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Tara was 27 years old when she
got married to Akeem in May 2011. Tara met Akeem through a friend while she was
still in college. They both courted for slightly over a year before saying “I
do”. And just in September, four months into their marriage, Tara fell ill and
could not make the holiday that her husband had booked for the two of them. She
was admitted into the hospital for few days and it was during this time that
Akeem her husband found out about her health condition. Akeem confronted Tara
when they got back home from the hospital and Tara admitted straightaway. Tara
said in an interview with Views247,
"My husband was very mad at me. I
tried pleading with him and explaining things but he wouldn’t listen. He was
very furious”.
From that time, Akeem refused to
do anything together with his wife Tara. He would not even sit close nor speak
to her. All Tara’s pleas and efforts to
talk things over with Akeem fell on deaf ears.
There was a time Akeem even left the house for about a week without
telling Tara where he was going and all Tara’s efforts to reach him proved
abortive. When Akeem eventually returned home, he told Tara that he was leaving
never return back to her. Tara thought it was all a joke but when Akeem started
packing up his things and moving them to a waiting car outside the house, she
realised that he meant business. Tara tried everything to stop Akeem going. She
even tried speaking to Akeem’s relatives both home and abroad to see if they
could help make her marriage work but to her surprise, they too like Akeem
changed their attitudes towards her and even stopped her visiting them. “None
of them really understood what sickle cell anaemia is. They treated me like I
had leprosy, like I was a walking corpse”, Tara said tearfully.
Tara hoped and prayed that her
husband would come back to her. She left messages on his phone, sent him
e-mails which included information on sickle cell anaemia in a bid to create
more awareness to him hoping that he would read and understand better but the
situation only got worse as after a while, Akeem contacted Tara and told her
that he was filing for divorce.
Although
sad and unfortunate, Tara admitted that she was not completely opened to Akeem
during courtship. Tara said that although she planned telling him about her
health condition sometime in the future but now she realises that telling him
before the marriage would probably had been a better option. Tara further said that
the only reason she didn’t reveal her health condition to Akeem before they got
married was because she was scared of losing him. In Tara’s own word,
“Considering the part of the world where we come from, he wouldn’t have continued
with the marriage if I told him. In fact, he wouldn’t have even proposed to me
if he was aware of my health condition. Most people believe that someone with
sickle cell anaemia would die at a very young age”.
So
do you agree with Tara or should you tell your partner that you are a sickle
cell carier or would you just rather be quiet about it? Share your views
If
you have any similar story that you would like to share, then reach us via
email at views247@gmail.com
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